Holding Fast


Doing my best to hold fast to belief in myself and the things that led me to this place. Doing my best to hold fast to the idea that I can’t hold myself solely accountable for being in this place and in this position.

Hard to believe I am here and yet here I am.

But the spirit that led me to dance in the fire is the same that pushes me to stand fast and to remember who I am and to trust that I always make it through.

I think about a friend who said goodbye to his wife yesterday and how now he and his children shall walk alone. Her time is ended and mine is not. It is a solemn reminder that though things are not quite what I want them to be they aren’t finished either. The difference between me and them is I have the choice to continue.

So I shall continue to tread water as needed and to swim for shore when land is seen. But you’ll understand that when my head slips below water it is not because I have given up but because sometimes the peace beneath the surface provides a quiet respite and time to recover some energy.

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